Shh...

I'm waiting for my bro to sleep so I can on the light on do things, in the light. So, yes... I'm typing in the dark. If there was a prize for typing in the dark, I'll definitely win 2nd prize!

I've been thinking about a lot of things lately - relationships, work, friends etc. And I can't help but feel that everyone is drifting away from me. Friends, family, especially family. My cousin in particular. As much as I don't wanna force my opinions, there are times when I don't really approve of some things. But being typical me, I don't know how to say it without hurting feelings or without sounding like a know-it-all.

Maybe its my age that's catching up, making me feel that there are a lot of things which could have been done better, or should be done in another way. All these are making me feel unsatisfied and whiny.

Maybe because my closest friends are going on a different path, it makes me feel lonely and sad. Maybe because they were always around when I needed them, or just because they are around, and even though I don't talk to them, their presence comforts me.

Oh, the light is on! Jeremy's gonna come in to do work.

As I was saying, although I don't have talk much to them, I knew they'd be around when I needed to approach someone. But now that I know they're gonna be MIA for at least a few months or a year, I can't help but feel sad...

Just maybe because, maybe because. I'm starting to sound like a old hag.

Alright, its back to studies for me.

Amazing grace

Another variation of Amazing Grace

Everlasting God

Nice Version of Everlasting God by Lincoln Brewster

You're 21!

Oh yes, although you wouldn't even see this, but here's one for you!

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY ERIC!!!

Although you keep pang seh-ing us, and bo jio-ing us,
we love you all the same. Touching right?

Boy to Man

That was the tagline for the slideshow today.

Today was David's enlistment day. Its was nostalgic seeing him enter the camp. And yes, I'm gonna miss having him around. Hopefully this blur sotong will become for alert and bright :D At least, Jin Le would be around to watch his back. Not always, but its good to enter camp with a good buddy right?

But today got me thinking about how soon, the 3 guys in my house will all fly away into camp turning from boys to real men. As much as I want them to mature, I'm gonna miss babying them (with exceptional of the oldest one). Haha, gosh, I sound like a mom. What to do? Who ask me to be the only girl at home. Stop growing so fast!

Then I thought about how women have to send the men off into army during war time, and to wait helplessly for their return.

I've been rather angsty and impatient the past few days, and I really don't know why is that so. Is it 'cause I've lack of sleep.

Where got time?

I'm really amazed at how my cousin can afford time to post about her life!

Well, that day when Clarissa say, "How do you know whether God exists? It's through other people's life". I paused for a moment and started thinking whose life have I seen God's work. The immediate person that popped out in my mind was my very dear cousin.

I've been watching her, from the day she came to knew and accepted Christ. I guess, being the older one i can't help but always wonder if she really knew who God was or whether she was doing it for some unknown reason etc.

But lately I've come to realise that God was working in her life. And that is a very great encouragement :)

Can't wait for Chinese New Year to come around and once it's here. I don't want it to end = deadlines :(

I think i spent quite a lot this month... Must cut down!

New Year Resolution:

- Read a christian book
- Lose 3 kg
- Spend more time studying
- Spend more time with cell

One by one...

They are all gonna enter into the world of manhood... Guns and all...

Why do I feel saddened by that?

I really should be doing work :P

I really should be doing my school work, but as you can see... I'm too lazy to get started...

Well, went to Uncle's house today and it was a good harvest. Well, uncle is this cleaner in my school who does calligraphy on my school tiles. He really is a very inspirational person. Mind you, his 83 this year and he builds his on stuff from scratch. He built wooden chairs, a brush stand, a door frame etc. He say he used to be a carpenter. I really admire his energy level and his ability to move around so vividly.

My shopping list: get uncle new papers for calligraphy, and occasional snacks :)

So, I've decided against coming up with a post for my Korea trip. Its too long and I'm too busy for that. Maybe when I've time. Instead, I shall put up pictures here and then and describe them :D.

Day 1 in Korea, Group photo outside the palace

Day 2 in Korea at the Ski resort. The youths.

Us, with Brian, Ethan, Tim and Matt at the
top of the Ski mountain.

Day 4/5 - At the top of the mountain where everyone was
freezing, people got blown away by the strong wind.

The last picture is my favourite group shot :) That was when everyone knew each other quite well already. Unlike the first 2 shots, we were much closer - in distance. I miss those days :( Looking forward to March though! haha.

Alright, hopefully, typing this post has gotten me started with my thinking process and inspiration for my work. Till then :)

I've got a feeling

There's this type of feeling.

You feel that it's there, but yet, you know its not suppose to be there. It's wrong but yet you can't help it.

It feels like it, but yet again, it feels another.

It's 2011

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!! :)

So, here's how I spent my first day of the new year.

After watch night service, we, a whole bunch of us, went to Meng Ren's grandfather's wake. Well, I think it was a different yet enriching day. I expect MR's grandmother to be sad and all, but no, she was happy and cheery. She told us about how she know that she was going to heaven after she pass away, and that thought, going to heaven to meet everyone makes her very happy.

Truthfully, that was the first wake I've been to where I don't see a depressed spouse. It reminded me yet again that to know God is really a privilege and that we shouldn't take that fact for granted.

On the side note, I don't like people who gamble during a wake. Ya, it can get boring staying there the whole morning, but come on, its kinda disrespectful.

We reached back in corp around 4 plus in the morning.

On New Year's eve, me and yong went to visit Brian and his family. Mainly to visit Ethan and to see their house. We brought dragged Brian to watch night service :)

Actually I have so much in mind that I don't know what to type. I'm supposed to post about Korea, but I'm kinda lazy now. Haha. Shall do it some time later when I'm more free.

For now, it shall be back to doing my awful website :(

It's my birthday :)

It's my birthday!!! I'm old :(

Materialistic

Materialistic:

–noun

1. A person who is markedly more concerned with material things than with spiritual, intellectual, or cultural values.

2. An adherent of philosophical materialism.

–adjective

3. Concerned with material things; materialistic.

4. Of or pertaining to philosophical materialism or its adherents.

Ok. Like what I've highlighted, I guess that best describes me now. Because of a malfunction wardrobe/closet/cupboard, I just want to get new clothes, new shoes, new bag and new underwear. It's bugging me and it's not good :(

I sense the pressure rising... SO MANY THINGS DUE NEXT WEEK!!! And i have yet gotten a single book to review on yet :( Sigh...

Birthday, birthdays...

Today is Jerrold's, Ellen's and Celine's <3 Birthday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY THE 3 OF YOU!!!

And in a week's time it'll be my birthday :)

Some time ago, I was thinking out loud to the people in school that I never really had a surprise birthday at all. Shery went, "Where got? We did one for you last year..." Then I remembered the sheep that she and Sam went looking around for me as a gift. Then I went , "Oh ya..."But, that's all I remembered - the sheep.

But when I got back home to think about what Shery said, I did indeed had a surprise birthday celebration. Although it was a short one, but it was a sweet and touching one. I remembered I was almost in tears.

I was at Jesca's place helping her with her LocVid AP. Late that night, they surprised me with a birthday cake. 'Cos my birthday was a few days ago, I had least expected the cake and what more, a celebration. So, it was the first surprise birthday celebration I ever had. A short and sweet one :) For the past few years, I always had to look for people to celebrate my birthday with me, but that one day, as cliche as it sounds, I felt special - like a little girl :D

Yesterday was David's birthday. We went to his house to surprise him. Kuang came up with this brilliant idea - He told David that Jin Le and him were going to his house to swim, and the plan was for the rest of us to turn up and surprise him.

The plan kinda changed. Kuang, JL, Rebe, MC and me, we met up at ard 9.45 a.m. to buy David's cake. The initial plan was to called David down to the swimming pool, but it was raining. Kuang called Deena, David's sis, if we could go up instead to surprise him, and we did.

Both Deena and her mom were super cooperative. They let us into the house and entertained David while we set up the cake and light the candle. Judging from the number of times David scratched his head, I dare say he was very surprised with us appearing.

Ooo, we got him this cake.

Winnie the pooh

Us :)

We spent the rest of the day playing Cluedo - a very fun game.

Well, December is always the best time of the year, and the poorest time of everyone's year.... But, as the bible says : To give is better than to receive.

I can't agree more on that...

The Imam and the Pastor

Oh yes! I went to help out at a Community Leader's Conference today, and boy was it insightful.

I never knew that the Bible and the Qu'ran were so similar in many ways. Well, I did learn a lot of things today, and I've seen real examples of what a full grasp of bible knowledge can do.

Shall work hard...

Sing to East and the West

Went to Yurong's place to celebrate her 21 + 1 Birthday today.

There was a huge crowd.

Her place was very much prenankan, just like lao gou's shop. I was quite mesmerized with the antique at her place, especially the very much antique porcelain jar. I had actually wanted to open and peek in.

The highlight of today was, that there was finally an EAST PERSON in the whole crowd! YEAH :D

I got a lift home by Mark, Cheryl's "friend". He stays in the East and that's rare. The people from church are either from the North or the West.

I think God does surprise me sometimes. Here I am, wondering how on earth to get home. He always manages to make someone appear to agree to send me home.

Anyways, I thought that the trip back would be quite awkward, but I guess it was alright. Cheryl, if you happen to read this - I totally approve of him ;) Haha... And no worries, I didn't tell him anything about you except for the fact that you and your cousins threatened to harm us when we were young.

OH yes, it's past 12 midnight....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOW GUAN YOU!!! You're OLD now :D

Red Lorry Yellow Lorry

Try saying that at a faster pace. Faster now. Okay, that was just me being random.

This is the 2nd time i dreamed of being knocked down by a car. David say its Exhaustion. Maybe i just want to experience being knocked down by a car? Haha.

I'm really tired. Too tired to do anything in fact. I just want my bed and my sleep....

Procrastination

I should stop finding excuses and do what I'm suppose to :( But the fact is, it really is hard to do work in a noisy environment and all I wanna do now is to sleep...

Director's List

Something really surprised me. When she read out my name on the director's list, I was like, WOAH~ I was really really surprised and happy at the same time. But despite that, I've started to worry. What if I don't get on the list next semester? Will I be able to continue to improve?
Can i do better?

I think i really need to step up in faith and like how i always encourage the rest - to do my best and let God do the rest.

My song of the week :)

Groups and AAAAAHHHhhhh.....

The first week of school is when the terror begins. Not the modules and not the timings, but more of the groupings and the people.

So this week, I made an enemy and I hurt somebody. I feel guilt towards the person I hurt. To my new found enemy, I really don't feel anything towards you. But sometimes i just feel like - What?!, when i see you.

I never knew that forming groups could ever be so full of drama and politics. This is the first time I've ever felt this way. In a dilemma between what's beneficial towards myself or towards a relationship. I know the answer already, but when facing the problem, everything just comes back to - ME. As a result, feelings are hurt, enemies are drawn.

I would like to think of it as a learning experience. And it also got me reminded of how critical the world can be. Talking to the rest today had me reminded myself of how God really has a purpose for everything that we faced.

Today was NPDOP. I really gave a lot of thought on what happened the past 4 days - My attitudes and behaviours. Some of the things I've done weren't the best solution and not very Godly. But I'm reminded again that i shouldn't take things into my own hands but place everything into God's. There's so little I can do, but so much He can do.

I'd swung my phone onto the road right in front of the bus on my way home. I immediately picked everything up, after I've picked everything up, tapped my card and sat down, I realised that my phone battery was missing. I panicked and thought it was impossible to find it 'cos the bus could have run over my battery, but i knew i had picked everything up already so how could it have gone missing? I checked my seating area, but no, it was no where in sight. Finally i just gave up and told God that if it appears, it will.

Something told me to alight from the front 'cos my batt might have flung out of my hands when i tapped my card. Lo and behold, it really was there when i was about to alight.

Moral of the story: God shows miracles even with the slightest things.

This week, my aim: To not be confounded by the worldly things, and to constantly remind mself of the Fruits of the Spirit.

雨过天晴

Thanks for clarifying things with me :)

I thought today's sermon was quite interesting and impactful. There were many things that could be learn from the story of Jesus feeding the 5,000 with 5 loaves and 2 fishes. The most important thing i picked out was to have faith of a child - Simple Faith.

I guess that's what I'm really lacking of right now. Shall pray bout it.